Monthly archives "July 2014"

Creative Block

I’ve had a creative block for about a year. If ‘creative block’ means ‘too lazy and too busy procrastinating’.

This hasn’t been a problem to date as I’ve been performing to different audiences trying to improve my set and work on my performance. However, next Friday I’m M.C. for a gig in my home town and I can’t get away with it any more.  I’m terrified.

I’ve written down ideas, I know I need to work on them to get them in some kind of structure, so why am I dicking around on Twitter and Facebook?

I can rely to a certain extent on the fact that the audience know me and want me to do well. I can also rely on my local knowledge and the fact that I know 80% of the audience personally. But that’s not enough, is it?

I’ve always been the sort of person who works better under pressure so I’m hoping this will be the case here. Won’t it? The hardest part is that it’s my fault. I should be working instead of watching Cake Boss or sitting in the pub getting updates on the state of the landlord’s ass (which has now confined him to the hospital).

My saving grace is that my daughter is now home from University. She’s not a comedian but she is an artist so understands how difficult and personal the creative process is. She’s also one of the few people in my every day life who can make me laugh. We’ll drink wine until 2 am and say motivating things at each other until we feel like we’re ready to take over the world. The next day we’ll drink coffee and talk about how crap we are at getting things done and how it would all be better if we just won the lottery. Then we’ll watch Say Yes To The Dress and wait for the commissioning editor from BBC3 to pop round.

I’ll be ready next Friday. I have to be.

Sleep is for losers.



No one Gives A Fuck

Sometimes people don’t write anything in their blog for a while, maybe a year. Then when they come back to their blog, they feel they have to do a post where they say “sorry, I haven’t been writing in my blog for maybe a year. I’m really going to try to be better at telling you about my meaningful life from now on. Really. I’m sticking with it this time”

No one cares.

No one missed you.

No one is going to chance across your sudden online reappearance and text their friends “Hey, Tarquin! Have you seen?!!! Jane Blah Blah Blah has started writing her blog again! I know, it’s awesome isn’t it?!! What? Yes, of course come round. I’m making Houmous right now – bring prosecco. And tell Jonty to bring his anti chafe cream!”

I’m blogging again.

No one gives a fuck.